Thursday, February 12, 2009

An Ode to the Post Office

Post Office, Post Office
I love you so
even though your service
is hella slow

Your limbs move like molasses
your speech like glue
but to you
I will always be true

Brown paper packages
tied up with string
love letters, gifts
perhaps a diamond ring

All the love
that flows through your doors
is heartening to see -
it makes my spirit soar

So I wait in line
(I'm number 15)
and think of all
the things you've seen

But on second thought
it's probably not much
cuz you never even look me in the eyes
or smile for that matter.
What are you even doing right now?
Whatever it is, it doesn't look important enough for you to be doing while the line is this long.
Don't you take pride in your work? Don't you want to?
Or are you ok with doing sub-par work day in, day out?
Don't you care that all 20 people in line are glaring at you in hatred right now? I mean, that's GOT to eat away at your soul.
Perhaps while you're sitting there, moving at the pace of an 80 year old arthritic woman, you could spend some mental energy trying to find a job you could do that doesn't involve customer service.
I mean, you're probably a decent human being and all, but clearly your strengths lie somewhere else.

I really like your stamps though.


  1. Love this! Maybe all the job/deliver-day cuts going on at USPS will finally light some competitive fire under their government tushes and they won't suck so much. Remember that time when they lost my journals? I do. I never thought I'd see the day when you had any criticism at all for the post office.

  2. I know. But I have this thing with customer service now. Like, do your job. All of it. Including the parts where you're supposed to make the customer feel welcome.